Overcoming Mental Stress

A member's testimony

Having been employed as an ironworker for 25 years, I began to develop both physical and mental stress. My parents' health declined and eventually they died. Enormous stress forced me to retire on disability.

I started experiencing intense and debilitating physical symptoms. I didn't know why, but I was more nervous than ever. This nervousness brought on difficulty in breathing, an upset stomach and I felt a lot of pain in my side. The thought of meeting people who might notice my condition only increased my symptoms. Eventually, I avoided going out. My life was changing rapidly. Going to church was an ordeal and traveling on buses, trains and planes away from home was out of the question.

I began thinking if this was the way I have to live, maybe life wasn't worth living. These thoughts terrified me no end. How could I end my life when I have a family, a wife and kids; what about them? I felt there was no way out. How would I survive?

Desperate for relief, but undecided about whether to consult a medical doctor or therapist, I scheduled an appointment with both. My family doctor couldn't find anything wrong physically and advised that it was probably my nerves that were causing my symptoms. The psychotherapist confirmed the same thing, recommending therapy sessions and a referral to a psychiatrist so that medication could be prescribed.

Eventually, I began to feel some relief. Then one day a cousin told me about a self-help organization that she had consulted several years before when she started to undergo panic attacks. She asserted, "Of all the doctors I went to and all the medication I took, the one thing that helped me most was Recovery International."

I decided to try it out. I attended several meetings in my neighborhood and heard people describe similar experiences with nervous symptoms. It was incredible to hear how life had changed so dramatically for them once they found Recovery International. They had gotten well even though initially they could not leave their homes, had stayed in bed most of the time, had been hospitalized often, and had even attempted suicide. I thought if they could do it, so could I.

Determined that this was the program for me, I continued to attend meetings regularly, studying and learning what was known as the Recovery International Method. More important than just knowing the method was to practice it. Of course, when you attempt to do something that you fear and hate to do, you most certainly will be uncomfortable. But the Recovery International Method taught us that our health improved proportionately by the amount of discomfort we were willing to bear. We understood that our symptoms are distressing but not dangerous. The things we fear and hate to do are the everyday things that the average person does. Thus, many of us turned what was once a vicious cycle of helplessness and hopelessness into a vitalizing cycle of self-confidence.

Soon after discovering Recovery International, I began to feel better. I undertook leadership training, volunteering my time to do whatever I could to help all those out there suffering needlessly and quietly as I had been. I have since opened three Recovery International groups in Brooklyn and continue to work tirelessly to identify prospective leaders within our groups to open more groups.

As of January, 2002, I became the Area Leader for New York City. My goal is to open as many doors as I can to reach out to both consumers and the professional community along with other volunteer, non-profit mental health organizations

A Professional's Evaluation of Recovery Techniques

http://myemail.constantcontact.com/Weekly-Wisdom.html?soid=1110322436115

http://myemail.constantcontact.com/Weekly-Wisdom.html?soid=1110322436115

A Moment in Conquering Stigma - a letter from Treasure Rice (to her daughter Treasure) a pioneer in self-help mental health for her work in recovery

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

A Moment in Conquering Stigma

This happened to me back in 1979 and I shared it with Mom. Since I just wrote about her dealing with stigma, I thought this a good follow up example of how we pass things on through our demonstration of self-leadership. I had joined a new group and was asked to read a preamble at a meeting which was quite large. As I started reading my hands and legs began to shake and it was hard to see the words on the shaking paper. I kept spotting that I could bear this discomfort in front of everyone and wondered what the realistic thing to do was. I grabbed a chair and as I pulled it up to the front of the room I explained to the group what as happening to me. I finished reading just fine and endorsed myself. Several people came up after the meeting to say they never thought of doing that and it helped them. Most of all it helped me! I endorsed myself for the effort and bearing the discomfort. I later shared this with my mother and this is what she wrote back to me. She was always encouraging in her words and we were so fortunate to be able to share the Recovery language with each other. Here is what she wrote in June, 1979:

Dear T. Ann,

It was just wonderful to be able to share your experience of victory over your fearful temper. Boy! It certainly proves what Dr. Low said that there is no danger and that a threat constricted to a pin point by tension one can still have a well modulated voice. Also, that "fear can be borne" and cause only discomfort (either severe or mild).

But it's one thing to hear that, read it, or even hear about someone else going through it, and a completely different thing when you are the person shoved into the situation and suddenly there you are - all alone in your body - with that body firing off swarms of symptoms! And of course, when all is said and done about 90% of it is danger to the social personality.

You took care of that when you mentioned your discomfort so forth rightly and proved again to yourself that there's no danger to your social personality either, because people didn't get up and leave or condemn you - in fact you know several people were helped by your action.

This "running forward" to meet discomfort and embracing it as a common human experience (perfectly average) begins to unhinge that fear. It may return, but next time you have this experience behind you and it is part of your memory bank. Having put your muscles through the experience, you will follow that up shortly by leading that meeting and shortly there after another challenge - until immunity forms, the fear will be yours. Not that you won't feel some nervousness - that's part of nearly all such "appearances" before a large group for practically everyone, but it will no longer be of overwhelming severity and intensity.

By the way, even if you had not sat down - you still would be in no danger - but the task at hand and the goal were to get the passages read aloud for the group. You finished the task and reached the goal and even further by laughing at the stigma we feel about our nervous system developing tenseness. The entire group must have relaxed when you did. Good for you. That really took courage!

Love,

Mom